Assalamualaikum W.B.T
People LIKE to compare themselves with others. That's typical fact for human beings in general. But there's also another typical fact about human. They HATE being compared. Irony aite!!
I have been thinking about this since long time ago. I think I've started to realize how annoyed I am to be compared to someone or something since I was 12. At that time, my mother compared me with my brother in relation to our academic performance. She was talking about how relaxed he was in his study and yet he scored. I am so pissed off at that moment because for me, everyone is different. We have our own style and in fact, he is a boy and I am not. He is brilliant and I am just so so. Since that moment, everytime my mother compares to anyone or anything, I'll just switch off. This is the time when the saying, "ignorance is a bliss" really applies to me and my situation. Come on, she's my mother and I don't want to be a disrespectful daughter. So, I better ignore whatever she said or I'll end up giving a rude response to her. You know, I just hate listening to such thing. It burns my ears ;P
But I guess, this is common among parents - comparing between children. For them, it's a kind of motivation. The same goes with teachers. They have more or less similar view about this. I don't know how true it is, but I believe almost everyone if not all, hate being compared to others, especially their siblings or friends/colleagues etc.
For me, such thing will never be a motivation source but a murderer to my self-belief. I am the type of person who wants to succeed in whatever I am doing based on my own pace, my own capacity and my own way. I do observe people and I did learnt from them but I just hate being told to do so. Why? Because I know what I am doing. I just couldn't be the person they told me to be. There's no two persons who are identical. So, let me be myself and please don't ask me to be another version of an already existed individual. I just can't be and even if I could, I would never want to. I just don't prefer copycats.heh~
So, as a reminder for you and for me especially as future teacher and parent, please please please avoid comparing your students and children. There's so many ways to motivate people and please make this the last method on earth to use :)
People LIKE to compare themselves with others. That's typical fact for human beings in general. But there's also another typical fact about human. They HATE being compared. Irony aite!!I have been thinking about this since long time ago. I think I've started to realize how annoyed I am to be compared to someone or something since I was 12. At that time, my mother compared me with my brother in relation to our academic performance. She was talking about how relaxed he was in his study and yet he scored. I am so pissed off at that moment because for me, everyone is different. We have our own style and in fact, he is a boy and I am not. He is brilliant and I am just so so. Since that moment, everytime my mother compares to anyone or anything, I'll just switch off. This is the time when the saying, "ignorance is a bliss" really applies to me and my situation. Come on, she's my mother and I don't want to be a disrespectful daughter. So, I better ignore whatever she said or I'll end up giving a rude response to her. You know, I just hate listening to such thing. It burns my ears ;P
But I guess, this is common among parents - comparing between children. For them, it's a kind of motivation. The same goes with teachers. They have more or less similar view about this. I don't know how true it is, but I believe almost everyone if not all, hate being compared to others, especially their siblings or friends/colleagues etc.
For me, such thing will never be a motivation source but a murderer to my self-belief. I am the type of person who wants to succeed in whatever I am doing based on my own pace, my own capacity and my own way. I do observe people and I did learnt from them but I just hate being told to do so. Why? Because I know what I am doing. I just couldn't be the person they told me to be. There's no two persons who are identical. So, let me be myself and please don't ask me to be another version of an already existed individual. I just can't be and even if I could, I would never want to. I just don't prefer copycats.heh~
So, as a reminder for you and for me especially as future teacher and parent, please please please avoid comparing your students and children. There's so many ways to motivate people and please make this the last method on earth to use :)
Salam~
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