Assalamualaikum W.B.T

Hello everybody! I hope all of us are doing fine no matter where we are right now. I am currently in Terengganu, a state where I found many interesting stories. Actually, I don’t know whether the interesting part come from the place itself, or it’s me who make everything looks interesting in my eyes =) This may be so perhaps because this is the first time I’ve been away from my place, my comfort zone. Last two years, when I was overseas, the feeling was a bit different because at that time I knew already and I sort of have set my mind to expect “the difference” between my country and the foreign land. But this time, when I first stepped my foot on the land some called it as “Darul Runtuh” (no offense please anyone…some Terengganu people actually mentioned that to me), I do not know what to expect. So any experiences that I had here feel so fresh, new and interesting so to say because I never had it anywhere else before.

Somehow, to a certain extent, I feel really greatful to be here. Praise be to Allah for arranging such kind of ‘fate’ for me. Though at times, I still have this feeling of “disbelief” that I am actually here and will spend few years of my life here, I am indeed happy with it. To tell you the truth, I actually wonder how can I feel so positive towards the fact that I need to be far away from my loved ones…ever since I received the placement letter. Even now, I wonder why am I willing to stay here for five-days-holidays when I am capable of going back to my hometown. Never in my life before that I would choose not to go back home whenever I am on holidays (except when I was overseas). But, that’s what happening now. I guess this is all God’s job. When I reflect back of what’s happening, I suddenly remember that I once prayed that if I am not getting a nearby place to start my career, I really wish that wherever I will be, I hope that Allah will give me these two things: safety and peace. Alhamdulillah, Allah gives me both. So far, I would say that the place I am currently at is considered as safe. And I didn’t expect the “peace” part would come like this. This feeling is so “powerful” that I didn’t expect it to have a total control of my life right now. I just realized that any “awkwardness” or whatever “changes” in my behavior and attitudes are the results of the “peace and tranquility” that God has sent to me to soothe my heart. MasyaAllah, what a blessing! Thank you Allah!

Now, what can I say is just that I am coping quite well with my new life in the new surroundings. I like my workplace, my colleagues, my housemates, my students, and Terengganu in general. I guess God is kind enough to let me have this kind of experience so that I could broaden my view and perception of life, so I could clear any prejudices that I had before towards certain people and places, so I could in the end be a very “open-minded” individual and most importantly not an egocentric one. That’s what I see for now and I am very looking forward to discover the many-more-interesting-facts that I believe God has prepared for me. I know this journey won’t be as easy as I want it to be, but I guess as long as Allah is there for me, I think life is just nothing without any challenges. For me, it’s from those obstacles that we learnt something about life and thus made the journey such a meaningful one especially for the benefits of the life in the hereafter.


To my family, my mom especially, you don't have to worry about me. Alhamdulillah, I am OK here. Although we are far by physical distance, yet it feels so near at heart. Just pray for me because it's the prayers that will safeguard me from anything. InsyaAllah, He will look after me on your behalf :) To my beloved friends, enjoy your stay wherever you are and insyaAllah, we will somehow rock the world in our very own way. All the best ya :)

Salam~

p/s: Now, I am 85% sure that I am “ok” with the fact that I am actually a “teacher”. I’ll definitely mark the day when I am 100% confident to say that I DESERVED TO BE A TEACHER =)

Assalamualaikum W.B.T

aku tak tahu syaitan apa yang dah merasuk kepala otak dia...
mungkin syaitan besar...atau dia sendiri yang jadi syaitan itu...
aku bukanlah nak cakap kasar di sini, tapi mengikut hawa nafsu itu bukankah dorongan syaitan...

yang pasti aku sangat marah dan kecewa dengan sikap dia...
aku memang pantang orang cakap kasar, meninggikan suara, membentak-bentak, atau yang sewaktu dengannya...lebih-lebih lagi pada orang yang aku sayang...
aku tak nafikan, aku memang jenis cakap kasar atau tinggi suara pada orang-orang terdekat, tapi bukanlah dalam kategori macam ni...cakap penuh marah dan hatred...

aku sangat berharap setan itu akan cepat pergi tak ganggu dia lagi...
aku tak sanggup tengok dia terus menyetan lagi sebab aku sayangkan dia...
aku cuma harap suatu hari nanti dia akan "bebas-setan" since aku juga tak boleh expect dia jadi malaikat...
yang penting, aku mahu dia belajar menghargai orang-orang sekeliling and most importantly Tuhan dia...in case dia lupa selama ni dia tu cuma hamba saja...

“Ya Allah, aku mohon kau bantu dia keluar dalam dunia gila itu. Aku mohon Kau beri petunjuk kepadanya sebelum terlambat.Amin”

p/s: tak pasal2 aku terpaksa pendingkan hasrat untuk update pasal diri sendiri dan tak pasal2 juga aku guna "aku" dalam blog...something yang aku memang cuba elak sebab bagi aku, kata ganti nama itu hanya aku guna dengan orang2 terdekat...bukan di alam maya seperti ini. mungkin sebab aku terlalu emosi sekarang...

Salam~

Assalamualaikum W.B.T

And now I discover another thing that irritates me. I hate it to the max when I have to shoulder another person's responsibility when the person is actually capable of handling it.

For me, each and everyone of us has our own set of responsibilities. When we are assigned with specific role or choose to do it, we have to be ready to carry any responsibilities that come along with it. I knew, there will be times when we would be incapable to handle all the responsibilities that we have on the list. So, that's the time when we ask for help. However, even when someone helps you to do your duty, you should never forget the fact that "it's still my duty and the person is just helping". So, be considerate. Don't let your duty be a burden to a person who is just trying to help you.

I don't know but I suddenly think that being a responsible individual is a very important quality of a good person. If we could be responsible to our own self, to our parents, our siblings, our families, our friends, our colleagues, our clients, our surroundings and most importantly our Creator, life wouldn't be so difficult Iguess. But I have to admit that the RESPONSIBILITIES I am taking about is in capital letters. So, mind you that performing it is not as easy as pronouncing it. But for a start, let us just mind our own business. I'll take care of my R, and you take care of yours...heh~

Salam~

Assalamualaikum W.B.T

Day after day, it seemed clearer to me that I am not that patient after all...sigh~ As much as I hate to admit it, I can't runaway from the fact that I am such a bad-temper person. Call me hypocrite or whatever you wish to call it, but this personality of mine is getting worse each day. I am starting to have a weak control over my anger especially when I deal with kids. Too bad too bad :( I know if "ghadhab" is one of the many "sifat2 mazmumah" but sad enough to say, I do possess such characteristic.

I remembered I read somewhere about "akhlak" where it's said that, "akhlak tak tumbuh seperti lalang...ia perlu disemai." So, I really hope I do have enough fertilizer or whatever it takes to fertilize it :)

Salam~

Assalamualaikum W.B.T

People LIKE to compare themselves with others. That's typical fact for human beings in general. But there's also another typical fact about human. They HATE being compared. Irony aite!!

I have been thinking about this since long time ago. I think I've started to realize how annoyed I am to be compared to someone or something since I was 12. At that time, my mother compared me with my brother in relation to our academic performance. She was talking about how relaxed he was in his study and yet he scored. I am so pissed off at that moment because for me, everyone is different. We have our own style and in fact, he is a boy and I am not. He is brilliant and I am just so so. Since that moment, everytime my mother compares to anyone or anything, I'll just switch off. This is the time when the saying, "ignorance is a bliss" really applies to me and my situation. Come on, she's my mother and I don't want to be a disrespectful daughter. So, I better ignore whatever she said or I'll end up giving a rude response to her. You know, I just hate listening to such thing. It burns my ears ;P

But I guess, this is common among parents - comparing between children. For them, it's a kind of motivation. The same goes with teachers. They have more or less similar view about this. I don't know how true it is, but I believe almost everyone if not all, hate being compared to others, especially their siblings or friends/colleagues etc.

For me, such thing will never be a motivation source but a murderer to my self-belief. I am the type of person who wants to succeed in whatever I am doing based on my own pace, my own capacity and my own way. I do observe people and I did learnt from them but I just hate being told to do so. Why? Because I know what I am doing. I just couldn't be the person they told me to be. There's no two persons who are identical. So, let me be myself and please don't ask me to be another version of an already existed individual. I just can't be and even if I could, I would never want to. I just don't prefer copycats.heh~

So, as a reminder for you and for me especially as future teacher and parent, please please please avoid comparing your students and children. There's so many ways to motivate people and please make this the last method on earth to use :)

Salam~

Assalamualaikum W.B.T

Tetiba saya terfikir, apakah karekter2 yang boleh menyebabkan seseorang disifatkan sebagai keanak-anakan atau childish.

Dan antara jawapan2 yang boleh saya fikirkan sekarang ialah:

tidak serius dalam kerja.
mudah ber'emosi' i.e. marah, merajuk dsb
bercakap tanpa berfikir terlebih dahulu
perlu di'ingatkan' berkali2 untuk buat sesuatu
dsb.

Pada pendapat saya, tak salah bersikap childish...asalkan sesuai masanya. Kalau menjadi 'dewasa' setiap masa pun mungkin tak menarik kehidupan ini. Come on, life needs colours. Tapi ada masa dan ketikanya, jika tak kena gaya, sikap begini boleh memakan diri. It's annoying!!! Jadi, apa saja yang kita nak buat pun, haruslah mengikut kesesuaian masa, tempat dan orang sekeliling.

Bila namanya pun childish, maka memang itulah sikap kanak2. Itu nature mereka. Jadi, sebagai orang dewasa, jika hendak mengendalikan kanak2, mahu atau tidak, perlu ada sedikit elemen childish dalam diri. Jika tidak, kita akan menghadapi kesulitan untuk menguruskan mereka. Kalaupun tidak punya sikap begitu, paling tidak, kita harus memahami sebaiknya fitrah mereka yang memang suka bermain setiap masa. Apa jua yang mereka lakukan, mereka asyik fikir untuk bermain, tak kiralah waktu makan, mandi, berjalan, apa sajalah. Jika kita tidak memahami sikap mereka yang memang tak pernah serius walau ketika melakukan perkara yang serius, sudah tentu kita akan mudah marah atau berang. Sudahnya, kanak2 tadi memang asyik kena marah dek kerana sikap mereka yang bermain tak kena tempat pada pandangan kita. Tapi yang sebenarnya, kitalah yang kurang bijak menangani situasi itu kerana pada pandangan mereka, life is about playing...be it a good play or a fool one.

Dan saya sebenarnya sekarang dalam proses memahami fitrah kanak2 kerana bagi orang yang kurang sifat childish dalam diri, this situation is not easy for me. Tapi, saya akan terus berusaha kerana saya percaya, orang dewasa harus bertindak mengikut rasional bukan emosi. Jadi, sebagai usaha untuk menjadi seorang ibu saudara yang baik dan mungkin seorang ibu suatu hari nanti juga untuk menjadi seorang dewasa yang matang pemikirannya, saya harus istiqamah meneruskan pendidikan ini. heh~

Salam~

Assalamualaikum W.B.T

I always said that travelling is not my cup of tea and I think it will never be. Suddenly today, I changed my mind. I think I should put it in my planner...as part of my to do list too. In my mind, I have pictured that I should at least, in a year, visit one place in the country. And in every two or three years, I should travel to any place overseas...beginning from neighbouring countries maybe.

But, this is just a rough plan or maybe I could just say a wish. Everything will depend on my financial condition and most importantly God will :) I really hope my plan next year could be realized. I wish I could visit the place that I've been dreaming for so long. I wish...I hope...God will make it true...insyaAllah :)

Salam~

Assalamualaikum W.B.T

apa bisa kucinta Kamu
sepertimana
aku dicinta Kamu
aku dijaga Kamu

atau Kamu terlalu indah buat diriku
beda dari diriku
aku pun tak menahu

p/s: i just love this...it's addictive ;P

Salam~

Assalamualaikum W.B.T

I don't know why everytime I wrote something about love as my fb status, people will start asking whether I am currently in love or in a relationship with someone and things like that. And my reaction would be, of course I am in love...every day and will always be...insyaAllah. Because for me, being in love does not necessarily require a person to be in a relationship with someone or dating anyone for I am currently not in that situation..heh~

Love for me connotes bigger intrepretation than love to your partner, parents, family, friends and whoever we called human. Don't ever think you are the greatest lover or could be one someday because the reality is, you can never be one. You know why, because human's love can never be separated with the word "expectation". When you love someone, you will expect someone to love you back. When you give the person something as the symbol of your love, you will expect the person do to somewhat similar in return. No matter how good or angelic you are, you must have this kind of feeling...even it weighs an atom. Even if you don't have any expectation, you will have hope...I believe :)

If you ever wonder who is the greatest lover then, the answer would be Allah, the Almighty. Why? Because when He loves he has no expectatation. His Ar-Rahman and Ar-Raheem have proven that He will give His nikmat to everyone regardless they're believers / not. But of course, there will be some differences in that sense. But my focus is more towards His power to love without hoping to be loved back. Don't u just think that is the purest love ever. I don't know but this is what I feel...

Actually, I am just trying to relate my feeling to this one song by Siti Nurhaliza. It is very unusual for me to actually make an effort to look up for the lyrics except when I feel like singing the song. But this time, the lyrics interest me. This song is more than what I assumed it to be typically be. So, let's explore the lyrics and see if you could feel the same like I did :)

Mereka meragui
Wujudnya cinta yang sejati
Tidak hati ini

Semenjak dari mula
Ku yakin ada cinta
Cintalah yang memungkinkan segala

Ku rela..
Biar betapapun perit tertusuk duri
Jalan berliku tiada bertepi

Ku percaya..
Tidak sia-sia aku diuji
Demi cinta..
Tersembunyi hikmahnya pasti

Pandang-pandang alam
ini
Sambil pandang difikiri
Mana bumbung langit tinggi
Mana lantai bumi

Tiap satu yang terjadi
Tidak mungkin tersendiri
Cuba cari jawapannya andai meragui

Ku rela
Biar betapa pun perit tertusuk duri
Jalan berliku tiada bertepi

Ku percaya
Tidak sia-sia aku duji
Ada hikmahnya pasti

Sejak mula ku percaya ada cinta

Cinta itu memungkinkan segalanya

Cinta suci
Dan abadi….

Title: Ku Percaya Ada Cinta

Artist: Siti Nurhaliza

Salam~

Assalamualaikum W.B.T

I just feel like orang gila. Browsing facebook like there's no tomorrow. Then, cam biase r, after browsing one person's profile after another, mula la nak feeling2. Malas betul part ni. Ah, persetankan. Time ni r teringat someone wrote about the real definition of personal happiness and contentment in life.

That the more we compare our life with others, the more we'll be unhappy...
That happiness and contentment would be achieved by having a strong believe in our God, our deen...

Okay, okay I surrender. Sometimes, it's not easy to fight the nafsu especially when the inside is not that strong. So, let's strengthen it..lalala~

“Berikan ilmu kepada akal supaya tahu. Suntikkan iman ke hati supaya mahu. Berjihadlah menundukkan nafsu supaya mampu."

Ayuh, fightooooooo oh!

Salam~